Wow Dilly, you really went broad spectrum here LOL! Ok, here's a good try of answering your question(s). First physically (of why "wrestling nekid" isn't made a priority)...most men start to lose testosterone around the age of 40+. Most women start their "peak" around 30-35+. Physical health can affect both genders. High blood pressure, being out of shape, heart problems, depression, medications taken for these ailments can also be a factor plus so many more things not mentioned here. There may just not be any "interest" or plain ole just being incapable because of these things. Emotionally...it sounds as if you and Jack do a wonderful job of making the other more important than your own selves. When one tends to be more selfish and unthoughtful of the other, then it robs the one who gives the most, of thoughtful actions/feelings to the other. They don't feel important enough so why give the most vulnerable, intimate part of yourself to someone who doesn't appreciate it?! One has resentment, so puts up a wall, the other cannot break the wall down without giving of themselves freely and unselfishly, therefore puts up a wall of their own, which leads to resentment on the first persons part also...etc., etc. You get the point. Life gets in the way and intimacy is no longer a priority because there is nothing left to give, then affects on the physical level. Most women need to feel loved (outside of sex) before intimacy can happen, most men feel that level of intimacy is accomplished by/during sex. Then you have some who just enjoy the physical act but never really experience the intimacy that should go along with it, so it ends up being the "no strings attached" kind. Spiritual level....this is where it gets really controversial and I know that some may not agree, but for those who do believe in God (and how He intended intimacy to be between two people) probably have some sense of what I'm talking about. This is where the "two become one" comes into play. And this probably explains why you and Jack are still/and more so "into" each other even after all of these years. When "wrestling nekid" (btw I love that term) happens, you connect on a physical, emotional, and spiritual level. You allow yourself and your partner the kind of pleasure and vulnerability that no one else ever gets to witness. The more that you can be free to do that with your spouse the "closer" you become with each other. The closer you WANT to be with each other. It doesn't become just a priority anymore, but something that both of you NEED from and WANT to give to each other. You become "spiritually tied" to each other. You give of yourself unselfishly and your partner is more willing to give unselfishly also. I know this is very analytical but I hope it helps answer your question!