Has Facebook made a good or bad impact on your family dynamic's
Posted 29 December 2012 - 05:29 PM
Posted 29 December 2012 - 05:40 PM
We use FB to share pictures, keep each other updated on events and news. Before we were doing mass e-mails but now that everyone is on FB it is easier. One niece in-law made a "family" page that we can all put stuff on if we do not want it on our own wall.
Posted 29 December 2012 - 05:50 PM
Posted 29 December 2012 - 05:52 PM
Posted 29 December 2012 - 05:53 PM
So yea, its been a positive thing for me.
Posted 29 December 2012 - 05:59 PM
Posted 29 December 2012 - 07:21 PM
Posted 29 December 2012 - 07:38 PM
Posted 29 December 2012 - 07:41 PM
Posted 30 December 2012 - 01:32 AM
Posted 30 December 2012 - 01:35 AM
Posted 30 December 2012 - 02:05 AM
I write updates about amusing things my kids do, or strange thoughts that I have had. It boggles my mind to think of sharing emotional opinions on there. I actually hid most people from my news feed during political season, it just gets annoying. I just want to look at your page, see a few pics and think "Yup, they are still alive, have cute kids/puppies/grandparents, and are still amusing. Cool. Now that I've squared that away, I will go back to MILA."
Posted 30 December 2012 - 09:23 AM
As for me, while I'm not worried about seeing pics of, say, events ODD and SIL have enjoyed with his FOO, overall, the mixed reactions I've heard are why I'm still on the fence. Also, while, at first, both my DDs encouraged me to join, when I recently suggested I might try it, YDD began to change her tune. Hmmm... Is she hiding something? I don't think so. I just think she feels I'm "in her life" enough, if only b/c of the GC ( and hey she asked me!) and FB gives her more "space." Or rather, it preserves her space - she doesn't discuss her personal life much with me but if I were on FB...
Actually, though, if I ever do join, I'll just use it to look at pics, etc., like some PPs and then come back over here!
Posted 30 December 2012 - 12:00 PM
Posted 30 December 2012 - 02:33 PM
Posted 30 December 2012 - 02:36 PM
Posted 30 December 2012 - 02:44 PM
My mom is on FB as well, and the only issue I've found there is sort of what Rose said - she's a little more in my "space". If I post something only my coworkers would understand as a joke (us nurses have a lot of inside jokes), she'll repeatedly ask me to explain it on FB and then call me to ask me to explain it if I don't online. I've had to tell her more than once she's not meant to know what every single thing means. My brother is a fitness nut and makes a lot of workout-lingo heavy posts and she does the same to him.
Posted 30 December 2012 - 02:44 PM
@ All - I'm wondering if this is another one of those issues that we need a whole new etiquette for? I'm not rigid about etiquette rules but in those places where they help things to go more smoothly or protect people's feelings, I think they can be very helpful. For example, I'm thinking that maybe it's like not talking about a part in front of those who weren't/might not be invited. Perhaps one shouldn't talk about/put up pics of events if it might hurt some people's feelings?
But then, I guess that would mean a large part of what many people use FB for - to put up photos of weddings and other events. So, IDK... Maybe it should be a general rule of thumb that all new ILs block each other, until they get to the point where they feel comfortable enough with each other to share a little more?
Perhaps I shouldn't talk, though, since I'm not on FB (as yet, anyhow). Does anyone else have any ideas about if there could be some social "rules" about it and what those might be?
Posted 30 December 2012 - 02:46 PM
Posted 30 December 2012 - 02:56 PM
I have one sister who has adult children. She personally told me she uses FB to keep up with what they are doing, because they don';t tell her. (In other words "spying" on them.) I'm sure they are aware of this and don't put up things they don't want her to see...but I try to stay out of my AC lives as much as I can.
I have a cousin somewhat like that. Her AC tell her about their lives but "not everything" and she's not satisfied. Yet, in their case, too, Sue, I'm sure there are some things they don't put on FB.
@NM - I'm sorry your mom insists on understanding all the "inside jokes," etc. Chances are, it bothers her a bit to realize that she's not the big part of your and your DB's lives as she once was. I mean, I'm sure she knows that but on FB, I guess, it kind of hits one "between the eyes," so to speak.
But thanks for making me aware of something I might not have thought of if I do go on FB. Now, if I join and I see my DDs talking about something I don't get, I'll stop and think if it might be an insider's comment. If I don't think so, maybe, I'll ask for an explanation but only if I'd really benefit by knowing. And if I ask once and they don't respond, I'll let it go. And again, mostly, I'll just look at whatever I want to look at and then leave.
Or maybe i'll just stay off FB...