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Roxie's Blog

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Going Along To Get Along....No More

Roxie01966

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A few days ago my husband and I were chatting with friends. We are all in our 60s now. As the visit wound down the conversation drifted toward things that we would do differently if given the chance to live our lives over again. With the wisdom of age and the benefit of a clearer lens people were ready and willing to share.The answers weren't surprising for the most part. I listened as my friends lamented their past choices. Some would get more education. Some wouldn't have let themselves get stuck in the job they didn't like. One wished she had traveled more before settling down with children. Some wished they could go back and do it all over again while others were content to be where they are. It was my turn. I chose my words carefully. I wanted them to be thoughtful and not hurtful. If I was to do it all again there are many things I would do differently; continuing my education for sure. Most importantly though I think I would not have been so nice, so easy going, so eager to please. I would have stood my ground more where it counted and not let myself be used and taken for granted so easily. I know these things don't seem paramount but they are too me. So many of my life decisions were based on the needs or wants of others and except where my children were concerned, I would have been more selfish. I know I have taken a back seat so that others could do something that was important to them. Unfortunately this is where resentment grows. I know it takes time to mature to this point but if I had it to do over I would have tried harder to be true to myself.To have the courage to say no without apology and know it doesn't make me a bad person. I would be brave enough to forge my own path and accept the consequences of my own decisions. I would have taken more risks. I know that none of us have the opportunity to do it over again. It is only the future that allows such change and I am ready to embrace it, finally on my own terms.




3 Comments


bethhl

Posted

There is really only one choice I would like to have made differently.  From that decision all else flows, like a major branch on a tree.

 

And like you, I wouldn't have been so nice, easy going; accepting (choosing)  a role that essentially put me in the role of "First Officer" of someone else's life rather than "Captain" of my own life.

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Roxie01966

Posted

Well said, With age comes wisdom. Some of us could have used it sooner. (me) ha ha

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geninusur7@yahoo.com

Posted

A casual, normal way of communicating with everyone in a certain situation for good.

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