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  1. Here comes December - a month full of holidays - Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Boxing Day (in the UK, Canada and other Commonwealth countries), and New Year's Eve!   @ GPs - Will you be w/ the GC you take care of on Christmas or any of the December holidays? And/or will you be doing any babysitting on New Year's Eve, while the parents go out, or during their vacation?   Or if you're raising your grands, are either of their parents expected to see them during the holidays?   Same questions for other relative caregivers.   @ Parents - Will your kids see the GPs/relatives that watch them (if any) during the holidays? Or will those GPs/relatives be watching your kids on New Year's Eve or during any part of the school vacation?
  2. In the "in defense of his mother" thread in MIL Anonymous, the conversation, somehow, turned to manners. So now I'm wondering...Do you believe in teaching manners/etiquette to kids? To what degree? And, if you will, is it ok for a GP to insist on stricter manners/be more lenient about manners when watching their grands?
  3. Maybe they always picks the GC (grandchildren) up from your house an hour or so late. Or perhaps they expect you to provide all diapers, wipes, baby food, etc. when watching their baby. Or overnight stays turn into 2 or 3 nights b/c they "have to" leave the kids w/ you for this/that reason. Or they frequently call last minute saying they "desperately" need you to babysit. Or maybe you're a custodial GP and your problem is that the parents don't show up on time for visits or don't come at all, leaving you to deal w/ GC's disappointment. Or... In short, perhaps you feel your GC's parents are taking advantage of you? If so, how - and what have you tried to do about it, if anything? Also, if you've found a successful solution for these kinds of problems or have an idea for one, please let us know.  
  4. Found an article in "The Spruce" called. "Maternal Vs. Paternal Grandparents" (you can google it) asserting that MGPs generally have a closer relationship w/ their GC than PGPs. For example, the article states that the MGM is more likely to be asked to help out w/ a new GB and more likely to be asked to babysit later on. It cites various reasons for this, including the idea that moms still are usually the ones who arrange for childcare and that there is "some tension built into" the relationship between the PGM/MIL and mom/DIL. Yet the article admits that there are "exceptions," and I know an increasing number of PGPs/PGMs who are the go-to babysitter/frequent caregiver for their GC. Perhaps the overall pattern is changing... Thoughts?
  5. Family Dynamics

    To what degree do you feel overall family dynamics are impacted the more involved a GP is w/ the care of their GC?
  6. Starting a new thread of tips/advice for GP/relative babysitters and "nannies." Please feel free to ask any questions or give your advice below. You might also want to respond to the (old) GP.com article about babysitting GC/relative kids: http://www.grandparents.com/family-and-relationships/caring-for-children/10-ways-to-be-the-best-babysitter
  7. We generally caution GPs not to interfere in parenting choices except in cases of abuse or serious neglect. However, what can a GP do, if anything, if they notice their AC or CIL "helicoptering" (is that a word)? And is there more leeway for granny (or grampy, etc.) nannies here since they're often "up close" to the situation and possibly more aware of any "overprotective" parenting? What if a custodial GP appears to be guilty of helicoptering? Do the parents or other relatives have a right to step in/speak up? Thoughts?
  8. As many of you know, "baby led weaning" (BLW) refers to the trend of by-passing purees and beginning, when baby is about 6 months old, to let baby learn to feed themselves solid foods. B/c babies are inexperienced at dealing w/ such foods, there often is a certain amount of gagging before they get the hang of it. Understandably, this is vey frightening for some people though others swear by it as a more effective way of teaching children to self-feed. In fact, recently, in the MIL Anonymous forum, an OP worried about what her MIL's reaction would be to BLW. So now I'm asking if you do/did/would do BLW w/ your baby and if you let/would let a GP/other relative babysit your child during the BLW period. Or if, as a GP/other /relative, you feel you could handle BLW if you were babysitting. Also, if a GP/relative can't deal w/ BLW, is there a compromise? Or do you feel that the GP/relative would need to forgo babysitting during BLW?    
  9. With Father's Day coming up, I thought I would post here about GF caregivers (since most of the GP caregivers we hear about are women). More specifically, I'm asking... do/did/would any of the GFs in your life (DH, DF (dear father), FIL, your own GFs, etc) ever babysit/participate in babysitting for their grands? Or are/were any of them involved in raising their GC if, sadly, the parents can't/won't or couldn't/wouldn't? Or, if you're one of our GF members, do/did/would you ever participate in "grandchildcare" of any kind?
  10. Whether you're raising your grandchildren or watching them frequently, etc., do you find the joys outweigh the challenges or vice versa? Are you grateful for the role you play in their life, resentful of the (perhaps unexpected) responsibility or a little bit of both? Or ??
  11. Here comes December - a month full of holidays - Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Boxing Day (in Canada and the UK), and New Year's Eve! And w/ that, winter vacation for most schoolkids!   @ GPs - Will you be doing any babysitting during the vacation? If you're the regular granny (or grampie, etc) nanny, will you have to step up your childcare schedule?   Or if you're raising your grands, have you made any other  arrangements for any part of the vacation, so that you can work or just get a "day off?"   Same questions for other relative caregivers.   @ Parents - Will any of your kids' GPs (or other relatives) be watching them at all during the vacation? Or will they, perhaps, visit GPs/relatives for part of that time?    
  12. GP.com recently linked the following article on its FB page: http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2016/08/09/need-a-babysitter-dont-count-on-grandma/?_r=0 It suggests, among other things, that GPs. nowadays, are not so ready and willing to make their GC the center of their lives or to be seen as the go-to babysitter. In response, on the FB page, in a post entitled, "Need a Babysitter? Don't Count on Grandma!" several people disagreed: https://www.facebook.com/Grandparentscom/# Thoughts? ETA: FWIW, as much as I enjoy my granddolls, the Rose who replies on the FB page is not me, LOL!
  13. What do/did you find to be your greatest challenge, as you raise(d) your kids/GC (or other relative children)? Or in taking care of your GC/relative kids while the parents are at work or out for an evening, etc?
  14. We've talked about "coparenting" in this forum before, I know. But in MBear's recent thread in MIL Anon, "Money/Time decisions," a concern about "parenting w/... inlaws" instead of spouse came up and that raised the "coparenting" issue in my mind again.... Frequently, on these boards, "childrearing" has been defined as a combination of childcare and making major decisions regarding that child. As such, GPs have often been told that, no matter how much childcare they do, they're not "raising" their GC, unless they make major/parental decisions about them. Is "parenting" defined the same way or does it only involve taking care of the kids? How about "coparenting?" Does it mean "helping to raise" or simply "helping w/ childcare?"  IOWs, is a GP coparenting a child w/ the parent(s) if that GP makes some of the major decisions about raising that child? Or can we use that term even for GPs who watch their GC frequently and/or for long hours? Does it depend on whether or not the child is living full or part time in the GPs' home? Or... ?? What do you think? At what point does "babysitting"/"caregiving"/"helping out" become "coparenting," if ever?
  15. My daughter works weekend nights as an ICU nurse and my SIL works Mon-Fri 8-5. So I babysit every Monday and Friday so my daughter can get sleep before and after her night shifts. I do not charge them any money but it is a financial burden on my husband and I. I LOVE my time with my grands but...... we are not rich. I do all the driving to and from their house. Also, my granddaughter only naps in the car so I have to drive around for 45 minutes each time. She is also a picky eater so I am buying a lot of McDonalds these days. I would never want to risk angering my daughter and SIL but this all adds up. I quit teaching to be able to help out but I didn't know I'd be doing all the driving. Do any of you charge money for watching the grands while your kids work? If I was just babysitting for a date night I'd never even think of it. But this is a regular thing I am doing so they don't have to take the kids to daycare. Any helpful advice for me? Thanks tons!
  16. Just read this GP.com article w/ interest: http://www.grandparents.com/family-and-relationships/caring-for-children/daughter-in-law?utm_source=newsletter&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=nl889&mc_eid=ecb5e393da Most of us know, I think, that, any GP caregiver, from the occasional babysitter to the frequent granny (or other relative) nanny, is expected to follow the parents rules for their children. But this GP.com article says that it also matters whether or not you (general GP/relative babysitter/nanny) attribute a rule to the parents or act just state it as/enforce the rule, period. What do you think? Does the wording matter?
  17. Do/did/would you go all out to childproof your home for your kids or GC? As a GP does/did/would it depend on whether or not you babysit them in your home and/or how often they're there? Or on whether or not you're raising them? As a parent - or as a custodial GP - how child safe does someone else' home have to be before you're bring your LOs/let your LOs be babysat there? In short, how important/necessary do you think childproofing is and to what degree?  
  18. In your opinion, does it really "take a village to raise a child?" And if so,  what does that say, if anything, about whether or not parents need help/support from GPs or other relatives? And as babysitters, granny (or other relative) nannies or ?? Also, if you're a GRG, do you feel you turn to other relatives for help/support as much/more/less than a parent would do? ETA: We've talked about this, on these boards, before, I realize, but not for a long time.
  19. Today is Valentine's Day, but after it's over, we still need, of course, to show love to our spouses/SOs, children, GC, etc. Here I'm asking, how do you show love to your kids/GC (or any other relative kids)? Gifts? Good food? Time spent together? Hugs and kisses? Appropriate discipline? If your the regular granny (or other relative) nanny, do you think your childcare efforts are what really shows them you love them? Same question if you've taken on the job of raising your GC/relative kids? Or... ??
  20. Whether they're your kids or your grandkids, what do/did you find to be the greatest challenge in childcare? (Same question if you often watch other relative kids.)
  21. Some people say it's harder to get kids outdoors these days b/c of all the fun, electronic toys, etc. they have in the house. And that this is more true in winter/when it's cold outside. What's your experience? Is it difficult to pry your children or the GC/relative kids you take care of away from the computer/3DS/ wii long enough to go play outside? And is it more difficult in winter/when it's cold out? Or easier, at least if there is snow to play in?
  22. Here comes December - a month full of holidays - Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Boxing Day (in Canada and the UK), and New Year's Eve!   @ GPs - Will you be w/ the GC you take care of on Christmas or any of the December holidays? And/or will you be doing any babysitting on New Year's Eve, while the parents go out, or during their vacation?   Or if you're raising your grands, are either of their parents expected to see them during the holidays?   Same questions for other relative caregivers.   @ Parents - Will your kids see the GPs/relatives that watch them (if any) during the holidays? Or will those GPs/relatives be watching your kids on New Year's Eve or during any part of the school vacation?
  23. @ GPs - Will you be w/ the GC you take care of on T'giving? And/or will you be doing any babysitting on the weekend that follows?   Or if you're raising your grands, are either of their parents expected to see them on or around this holiday?   Same questions for other relative caregivers.   @ Parents - Will your kids see the GPs/relatives that watch them (if any) on TG? Or will those GPs/relatives be watching your kids during any part of the weekend that follows?
  24. Sometimes parents come on these boards complaining about GP babysitters/caregivers who bend or break their rules for their kids. OTOH, sometimes, GPs come here griping about being "micromanaged" by their AC or CIL. So now I'm asking...   @ parents - Do you think that a GP babysitter/caregiver needs to follow every one of your rules to a "T?" Or is there an extent to which it's ok for them to bend the rules? Are there any dealbreakers?   @ GPs - Do you feel you're given some/a lot of leeway when you watch your GC? Or do you often feel you're being micromanaged? And can you accept some micromanaging or is there any place where it becomes a dealbreaker?   @ All - Same questions can be applied regarding any other relative babysitter/caregiver.   And, of course, please answer as many - or as few - of my questions as you'd like.  
  25. Do the GC/relative kids that you take care of ever talk to you about their parents? Positively or negatively? If it's negative, how do you handle it?   Or if you're the parent, how would you appreciate your child's GP/relative handling this sort of thing?   All opinions are welcome...