• Announcements

    • LaToyaADMIN

      Tell us about your experience with signing up for Medicare   01/23/18

      We want to know what the process was like for you, any difficulties you experienced, the length of your process, etc. This is strictly research and any information you share with us will not be shared elsewhere. Please email jack@grandparents.com with the subject line: Medicare Process and we'll be in touch with specific questions.
    • LaToyaADMIN

      PLEASE READ: We are moving the community   02/15/18

      Dear Community friends and family,   After great consideration, we are moving the Grandparents.com community to Facebook Groups effective March 15, 2018.   This wasn’t an easy decision, but we want to bring our communities together and believe the best place to do so is through Facebook’s groups feature. We’re so appreciative of you and the diverse conversations and opinions you have provided over the past 9 years. Your stories and amazing advice have helped so many readers, and have reached thousands of GP.com users. We encourage you to retrieve any information you want to retain as the forum will only be accessible by the admin after March 15, 2018. We’ve created a closed Facebook group called Mothers-in-Law Unplugged where we welcome you to continue the conversations around grandparenting, family, and in-law relationships, and any general topics we discuss here. As the group is closed and each user must be approved, your friends and family on Facebook won’t see any of your activity. Request to join the group here: http://bit.ly/milunplugged Thank you to all of our past and current users. You helped build our community, and we look forward to continuing to interact with you in the Facebook groups. If you have any questions about the groups and privacy, let’s chat about here:   Sincerely,   The Grandparents.com Team

Search the Community

Showing results for tags 'change'.

  • Search By Tags

    Type tags separated by commas.
  • Search By Author

Found 6 results

  1. ... and could change anything in your family dynamics, what would it be? Something about your kids/GC (grandchildren)? Something about the parents of your GC? Or the GPs of your kids? Or ??     ETA: Caution - Some of the posts in here are painful.
  2. How do you expect/want your caregiving role to change in the coming year, if at all?
  3. Crystal Ball?

    In the thread, "Why Are So Many Grandparents Raising Their Grandchildren?" Sue told us about people she knew who raised their GGS and all worked out for the best. No doubt, that often happens, but then there are the times (as I pointed out in the other thread) where things don't work out so well.   So now I'm asking... whether your raising your GC/relative children, helping to raise them, taking care of them frequently or serving as the go-to babysitter, etc... if you had a crystal ball, what do you think it would show about your relationship with those kids in the future?
  4. As caregiver for your GC, do you sometimes feel as if you're "half parent/half GP? Or are you actually acting as parent (raising your GC)? Or have you become the parent, by adopting your GC? And do you ever get to be "just Gandma/Nana/Mimi/etc" (or "just Grandpa/Papaw/Poppy/etc)?   Please answer any or all of my questions below.  Even if you've talked about this with us, in the past, please feel free to chime in and let us know if your feelings or your caregiver role, itself, have changed. And if you're a GGM or aunt caregiver, etc., please just adapt the question(s) to your situation.
  5. Metamorphasis

    One theme that seemed to run through the Husbands and Sons thread is that of whether or not one spouse can change another and how parents/PILs feel about that. It became quite obvious in the conversation, IMO, that an AC's look and behavior often change when there are problems in the marriage. Also many parents - and siblings, too - say they "know"/"knew" what those changes mean/meant. And, of course, they feel for their AC (or sibling). But except in cases of abuse, I'm wondering if those changes always mean that the AC's spouse is soley at fault? I'm thinking that the fact that there's trouble in the marriage and AC seems sad, etc. doesn't mean it isn't a 2-way street. Or am I stating the obvious? I'm also thinking that it isn't always as cut-and-dried as the "light going out of" AC's "eyes," during these issues and "going back on," once they separate and/or divorce. YDD's spirit went down, for a while, more after her split and eventual divorce from XSIL than during the last part of the marriage. Eventually, I saw it pick back up but not till some time after the divorce was final. But I also think that, sometimes, we parents get upset when we see changes in our married AC (or AC in serious relationships) just b/c they're changes. There are certain things I notice ODD does differently now, admittedly b/c "SIL says..." Not that she's dominated by him but b/c she's truly influenced by him. But, I confess, it gives me a strange pang, sometimes, to think that this guy - a great guy, IMO - has had such impact on my DD whom DH and I raised and have known and loved so much longer, etc. Yet, of course, I know she has influenced some of his thinking and behavior, too. And maybe it bothers his FOO a bit, even though they really seem to like her. But isn't that part of what becoming a couple is all about? One adjusts a little to suit the other and vice versa? And one even begins to see some things through the other's eyes and vice versa? We so often hear that "marriage is compromise." But very often, doesn't that compromise mean giving up some traditions or practices that were "always" part of one's FOO? And I' thinking, too, that often we see our AC changing and not always in ways that we like. Even when it is for the better, I can throw us, sometimes, IMO. For example, at one time or another, each of my DDs has gotten into some form of "healthy eating." A good thing, no doubt, and I never said otherwise. But as irrational as it sounds - and probably is - it often hurt me to see them pass up this/that former favorite food or drink. Is that just me or has anyone else ever felt that way upon seeing a major change in their AC (or parents or siblings, etc)? If so, do you think it it hits any harder when the change seems to be "b/c of" spouse or SO? And if so, why? I guess I'm covering a lot of different aspects of this topic here and asking a lot of different questions, Please feel free to pick up on any one or more of them below. And though I know some of these topics may lead us into controversial waters, I trust we can all be kind to each other/speak to each other with respect.
  6. Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow

    Thought I posted this last night, but I guess it didn't "take," somehow, so trying again... If anyone had told me, years ago, that, someday, as a GM (grandmother), I would spend part of my time at computer, on a thing called "the Internet," chatting about my life and family with hundreds of total strangers, I would have laughed and thought they were "crazy!" Yet, here I am doing it! So now I'm wondering what changes will take place in the future - and what some future reader, if any, will think of what we talk about here and how we go about it. Will GP (grandparent) caregivers, like me, be a thing of the past or the absolute norm? Will the "family" look much as it does, today, with all the variations it's already experiencing? Or will it have taken on such a new shape that the conversations on sites like this will be entirely different? Will we even still communicate with each other in this way? Or will technology have brought us whole new forms of contacting each other that we can't even imagine right now? As a Boomer GM, I recall when the electronic typewriter was the most modern piece of equipment in my family's home. Now it seems quite "primitive." Will our ways of communicating seem just as archaic to some future reader? And as much as I hate to say it, will this material even still be here? Or will it have disappeared as the technology became outdated and newer types of communication took over? Regardless, I expect I'll be talking a lot about changes, as I blog - those that I underwent as I took on the caregiver role and those I've gone through and am still going through as my role, itself, evolves. But with these kinds of questions in my mind, I almost can't help addressing myself to that possible future reader, as I write, as well as, of course, those of you who are reading here and now. That is, if this blog is even still here in the far future and if any reader, at that time, is even interested in what's said by a "nanny granny" from the early 21st Century!