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      What to do if you get a "Wrong Password" message   01/21/16

      You must reset your password (even if you know it's the right one) before you can sign into the community. Thanks to the upgrade, there's an issue with passwords and signing in. The good news is that you can click here: http://community.grandparents.com/index.php?/lostpassword/ to change your password (it'll let you reuse your old one). If you can't reach the email address connected to your account then please contact the admin at latoya@grandparents.com and I'll help you sort it out. 
    • LaToyaADMIN

      Anonymous posting is back   01/21/16

      We've removed the extra step that required you to go to the full-page editor to access the anonymous post option. Now, you can reply to a post and toggle the button to post anonymous (see photo below).    Read more on anonymous posting here:    In short, the mods can see who posts as anonymous, we moderate anonymous posts the same as revealed posts, you can reply anonymously to your own topic, you may report anonymous posts.

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  1. Do your kids/GC get out in the snow? Making "angels?" Building snowpeople or snow forts? Having snowball fights? Sledding? Skiing? Do you get out there w/ them or do you leave that to the parents (if you're a GP),  the GPs (if you're a parent) or other adult relatives or friends? Or are they old enough to be out there by themselves? Or does your family just not "do" snow? Or??
  2. The GP.com FB page is featuring the following article about GPs who think their AC/CIL are "too permissive" (my words): https://www.grandparents.com/family-and-relationships/family-matters/permissive-parenting Then again, there are GPs who have come in here and complained that their AC/CIL were "too easy" on the GC. And parents who gripe that the GPs are too lenient w/ their kids and bend/break parental rules, etc. So now I'm wondering... If you're a GP, have you ever thought your AC/CIL were too strict/too permissive? Or as the parent of underage kids, do/did you ever think either of these about their GPs? Or hey, have you ever felt that the parents/GPs of any other relative kids were too strict or too lenient?
  3. What does the expression "helicopter parent" mean to you? Is there such a thing as a "helicopter GP?" Also, if you care to share, do you see your GC's parents as helicoptering? Or have they ever accused you of same as regards your babysitting/caregiving style? Or, as a GRG (grandparent raising grandchild/ren), have you ever been told you're "a helicopter?" Or if you know anyone that you feel is a helicopter parent/GP - a friend, cousin, aunt, nephew, etc - please feel free to draw on that, if you'd like, in this conversation.
  4. Do you favor placing babies/toddlers in a playpen/play yard often, perhaps for safety reasons? Or as infrequently as possible, to give them more chance to roam freely/explore, etc? Does it make a difference whether or not they're w/ a parent or a GP/relative caregiver (or a hired caregiver, for that matter)? And, if you will, how much difference do you see, if any, between the traditional - old-fashioned (?) - playpen and today's play yards?
  5. School for Grandparents?

    Have you heard of "Grandparenting Classes?" Are you going/have you gone to any? And/or what's your take on them?
  6. What do/did you find to be your greatest challenge, as you raise(d) your kids/GC (or other relative children)? Or in taking care of your GC/relative kids while the parents are at work or out for an evening, etc?
  7. Spring Break?

    Maybe your kids or GC are on spring break. Or perhaps they were recently - or will be soon... My DGC will have their spring break next week. Their mom will be on break from her school, too, but she'll be working more hours. So I'll be watching them less time, overall, but my schedule will shift. How about you? If you're a GP, does spring break mean you see/watch your GC more often? Or less b/c the parents are have some days off, too? If you're a parent, does it mean arranging (additional) childcare? And if so, do you turn to a GP/relative or professional childcare? Or hey, if you have teenagers, are they ok on their own?  
  8. Do/did/would you go all out to childproof your home for your kids or GC? As a GP does/did/would it depend on whether or not you babysit them in your home and/or how often they're there? Or on whether or not you're raising them? As a parent - or as a custodial GP - how child safe does someone else' home have to be before you're bring your LOs/let your LOs be babysat there? In short, how important/necessary do you think childproofing is and to what degree?  
  9. Have you seen the article about "spanking" on the Home Page of this website? The article quotes "pediatric experts" who recommends strongly against it. But the reaction of those who replied is mixed. Where do you stand on this issue? Are you for or against spanking as a consequence or somewhere in between? Also, is it a bone of contention between you and the parents of the GC you take care of? Please answer one or both of my questions below. And feel free to say as much - or as little - as you'd like... ETA: The article on spanking is no longer featured on the Home Page. If you'd like to read (or reread) it, first, go to the Home Page (click on the website title, above), and click on "Grandkids." Then go to the sidebar on the page that appears, click on Discipline and Behavior and you'll see it.
  10. Whether they're your kids or your grandkids, what do/did you find to be the greatest challenge in childcare? (Same question if you often watch other relative kids.)
  11. Some people say it's harder to get kids outdoors these days b/c of all the fun, electronic toys, etc. they have in the house. And that this is more true in winter/when it's cold outside. What's your experience? Is it difficult to pry your children or the GC/relative kids you take care of away from the computer/3DS/ wii long enough to go play outside? And is it more difficult in winter/when it's cold out? Or easier, at least if there is snow to play in?
  12. DH and I have been mostly taking it easy this weekend. All our Christmas shopping is done, as well as the wrapping and decorating, etc. Watched the GC, Friday night, so YDD could go out and celebrate the end of her school term w/ some of her classmates. But otherwise, no babysitting this weekend.   Meanwhile, how's your weekend going? Are busy w/ your kids/GC this weekend or do you have it all to yourself/for you and your spouse/SO? Or a little of each? Doing anything holiday-related (shopping, wrapping, decorating, etc)? Or just relaxing? Or ??
  13. Exhausted!!

    A few posters in this forum have recently mention being "exhausted" or even "burned out" by childcare. Not unheard of for GP caregivers or even parents, as much as we love our kids or grandkids. In fact, it has been a common enough theme in this group that there are a number of threads here on the topic. However, they're old, so I'm opening this new one to ask, just how tired are you? Or how tired do you get after, say, a full day/several hours of taking care of those beloved children/GC?    
  14. What do you think is the best option for parents who need "outside" childcare? A GP (or other relative) caregiver? A daycare center? A hired/professional nanny? Does it depend on the child's age? Or... ??
  15. April showers may bring May flowers, but they also often keep kids inside and looking to be "entertained."   If there's no further HW and the chores are done, how do you help your children or the grand(relative)kids you take care of  find "something to do?" Do you have any creative ways of keeping them occupied or do you tend to leave it all up to the TV, computer, etc? Or do you, instead, leave it up to the kids, themselves? Hey, even if don't have/are not watching any kids, these days, please feel free to share your ideas below...
  16. I keep reading that this is Autism Awareness Month. And that got me to thinking... If you have an Autistic child or if the GC/relative kid you watch or are raising/co-parenting is on the spectrum, how are the challenges you face different from those of other parents or GP/relative caregivers, if at all? And, if you will, how are they the same?   ETA: The Topic Tags, "Autism" and "childcare," above, were actually meant to be entered separately, FWIW.
  17. The "responsibility" thread in MIL Anonymous reminded me of when I had to balance helping out w/ my MIL against my being a caregiver for my DGC. I used to pinch hit for SisIL about once a month, so she could get a day off. But that was usually on a Saturday when I wasn't needed to watch the kids. However, I was the one who went w/ MIL to her doctor's appointments (DH drove us there but I spent time w/ her in the waiting room, etc., while he tried to find parking, which was often difficult). Fortunately, SIL was good about working out the appointment dates and times w/ me so they wouldn't conflict w/ my schedule w/ my DGC. Also, in my view, my first priority in this matter was to YDD and the kids, not MIL. Lucky for me, both DH and SIL understood this. (I think MIL would have, too, at least, in the early stages of Alz. But IDK if it was ever discussed w/ her. )   But now I'm wondering... are you/have you ever been sandwiched between caring for an aging parent or PIL and taking care of your kids/GC? And if so, how do/did you balance the two? What are/were your priorities and, if you will, how does/did that pan out?
  18. When I was a young mom, years ago, DH and I divided up our roles in a very traditional way, as did most of the young couples we knew. He was the "breadwinner" and I was a SAHM who did the bulk of childcare and housework. He pitched in w/ the house and the kids to some degree, but very little. It's the reason I felt the need for DM's help and even had her stay w/ us for about a week when I had ODD.   How about you? How do/did you and your spouse/SO divide up the childcare? And where does/did a GM (or GF) figure in, for that matter (or do they)?   Also  if you're a GP/relative caregiver of any kind, to what degree does your spouse/SO pitch in w/ the childcare, if at all?
  19. Watching an old rerun of  "Full House" w/ DGD, one day, recently (she loves that show), I started thinking about how "Uncle Jesse" and family friend, "Joey" interact w/ the kids. If you've ever watched this show, you may recall that these two guys not only moved in w/ "Danny Tanner" and his DDs, after the mom passed away, but also help in the childcare and the childrearing. IOWs, they not only, sometimes, prepare school lunches and change baby diapers, etc., but also are allowed to give advice to the girls, make decisions about discipline, etc.   What's your take on this situation? Does it reflect the reality of what usually happens when other adult relatives share a household w/ a parent and their kids? And do you think this kind of arrangement makes sense?
  20. How does Daylight Savings Time affect your schedule, especially w/ your kids? Do you find yourself letting them stay outside more/planning more outdoor activities? Are you more likely to visit w/ grandparents, other relatives and/or friends for longer hours? Or??
  21. Now that the Blog section is open, it seems to be developing rapidly. And several of its entries are of special interest, IMO, to GP caregivers. You can see for yourselves, of course, but I've decided to note them here, just as a convenience. For now, I'm spreading the list over "replies" - General - of interest to all kinship caregivers, Nanny Grannies, Et Al - of particular interest to nanny grannies and grampies and so on, and Grandparents Raising Grandchildren - of particular interest to those who are raising their grand(or other relative) children. (No doubt, anyone and everyone on this site might find any and all of these blogs informative, entertaining and/or intriguing.) Please feel free to comment on any or all of these or the Blog section, overall, below... ETA: Blog entries are coming in "fast and furiously" now so I may not be able to "catch" all the ones that are of interest to us caregivers. If you see one that I miss, please post about it below. Thank you.
  22. Of course, the opinions of parents of underage children - as well as other GP.com members - are always welcome in this forum, as in any other. However, no doubt, many of the threads here focus on the concerns and experiences of GP/relative caregivers. So I thought I'd post this thread to focus on the younger parents' viewpoints about family childcare v. professional...   If you're a parent of underage children (under 18) do/would you ever turn to a GP or other relative caregiver for your child? Why or why not? And if you have, if you'd like to share, what are/were your experiences?   Granted, as in the threads directed more at GPs, all other posters are welcome to weigh in, too. But the focus of this thread is on the parents.
  23. Migrant's latest thread in MIL Anon made me think about the differences, if any, between family daycare and a professional or hired nanny. Please take the poll above and feel free to elaborate below.   Also, often we hear people say, "Free childcare is never really free." Do you agree? Do we nanny grannies (or grampies, etc) tend to exact a price, in your opinion, whether intentionally or not? Should we? Or do we pay one? (No worries, you won't hurt my feelings if you're not fond of family daycare. And while this is, basically, a support group for GP/relative caregivers, I see no problem with expressing some concerns, if you - general - have them.)
  24. Do you find yourself in what is often called "the Sandwich Generation?" Are you squeezed between caring for, say, an elderly parent and a young grandchild (or grandchildren)? Or are you/have you been in a similar situation? On the Home Page, GP.com has posted a Question/Answer column, right now, about just this problem: http://www.grandparents.com/family-and-relationships/caregiving/sandwich-generation-caregiving-dr-marion   But now I'm wondering... if you're in that situation, how do you cope?   Also, if you're the parent of the GC in this scenario, do you find ways to be flexible so the GP (or other relative) can find time for their aging parent more easily?
  25. Potty Training

    What are some of your best potty training tips? Do you favor training pants or not (or perhaps only for night training)? And, if you'd like, please let us know also if you and the parents see eye-to-eye on this issue.   ETA: Please answer any or all of my questions below. Your reply can be long or short and please feel free to add any other thoughts you may have on the topic.