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RoseRed135

The CPS Experience (possible triggers)

27 posts in this topic

Sometimes, when CPS (or ACS, DHFS or whatever the acronym is where you are for the child protective agency) takes children away from their parents, it's difficult for the parents and/or GPs to get to see/contact them. Other times, GPs (or other relatives) are asked to take the kids in. But either the parents resent the GPs/relatives for this or CPS instructs the GPs/relatives not to let the parents (and perhaps some other relatives) see/contact the children. Then again, there are those who find that the CPS  (or equivalent) in their area "does nothing" and others who highly admire them/have had good experiences w/ them.

Thoughts? Experiences? Observations?

Edited by RoseRed135
to add trigger warning

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On 2/14/2017 at 5:43 AM, RoseRed135 said:

Sometimes, when CPS (or ACS, DHFS or whatever the acronym is where you are for the child protective agency) takes children away from their parents, it's difficult for the parents and/or GPs to get to see/contact them. Other times, GPs (or other relatives) are asked to take the kids in. But either the parents resent the GPs/relatives for this or CPS instructs the GPs/relatives not to let the parents (and perhaps some other relatives) see/contact the children. Then again, there are those who find that the CPS  (or equivalent) in their area "does nothing" and others who highly admire them/have had good experiences w/ them.

Thoughts? Experiences? Observations?

 

On 2/14/2017 at 5:43 AM, RoseRed135 said:

Sometimes, when CPS (or ACS, DHFS or whatever the acronym is where you are for the child protective agency) takes children away from their parents, it's difficult for the parents and/or GPs to get to see/contact them. Other times, GPs (or other relatives) are asked to take the kids in. But either the parents resent the GPs/relatives for this or CPS instructs the GPs/relatives not to let the parents (and perhaps some other relatives) see/contact the children. Then again, there are those who find that the CPS  (or equivalent) in their area "does nothing" and others who highly admire them/have had good experiences w/ them.

Thoughts? Experiences? Observations?

 

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I think it's a shame because it shows a lack of unity in the department.  They make these laws and try to enforce them for the good of the child but really in the long run sometimes it only hurts both parties, the child and the GP.  If there was a case where child endangerment is involved then I can see their point but when it's just the GP's trying to visit their GC then why is it such a big deal?  CPS comes in and they take a look around at your house, sit and ask you questions then they go to the parent and do the same thing then report back the court about their findings and a recommendation is made based on that..........based on what?  Time is of the essence with these cases and I get that but sometimes things just can't be sorted and remedied all in the same day.  Some of the CPS workers are unfeeling and de-sensitized but I feel that that has to be a part of their job.  If they were too sympathetic they would never get their job done successfully.  All I am saying is ask the child, consider their feelings as well.  Things are always the way they appear......................Just saying!

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4 hours ago, krisstine2u said:

I think it's a shame because it shows a lack of unity in the department.  They make these laws and try to enforce them for the good of the child but really in the long run sometimes it only hurts both parties, the child and the GP.  If there was a case where child endangerment is involved then I can see their point but when it's just the GP's trying to visit their GC then why is it such a big deal?  CPS comes in and they take a look around at your house, sit and ask you questions then they go to the parent and do the same thing then report back the court about their findings and a recommendation is made based on that..........based on what?  Time is of the essence with these cases and I get that but sometimes things just can't be sorted and remedied all in the same day.  Some of the CPS workers are unfeeling and de-sensitized but I feel that that has to be a part of their job.  If they were too sympathetic they would never get their job done successfully.  All I am saying is ask the child, consider their feelings as well.  Things are always the way they appear......................Just saying!

Wlecome krisstine! Glad you came in to share your thoughts w/ us!

Things are always the way they appear.........

Did you intend to say this ^^^? Or was the word "not" left out by error? Just asking b/c, of course, it changes the meaning?

 

 

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DsD is a CPS supervisor. Her goal always is "what's in the best interest of the the child". Family unification is always the first goal, but if the parents aren't willing or able to do their part in providing a safe home for the child, the child goes into the system. Her cases are well supervised, by her. She knows what a healthy home looks like because she was raised in one. For all that we were a blended family (DH had one, I had two. When we married we tossed the kids into the house and said "get on with it", they did and are very very close). Her parents split by the time she was 3, and spent most of the time with her dad. Her mom was a complete and total flake during her childhood, so she knows what to tell many of these parents who don't put their kids first. She is still dealing with abandonment issues from her mom. 

Kids' feelings matter so we need to listen as well as take them seriously.

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Thank you all for commenting on my situation & giving your honest opinion.  I've heard of a few people say they did have good experiences; this is great for them. There is the daughter of maternal GM side w/the paternal GM  if they get mad at the Mat. GM.  I had to stay home with the kids, take them & p/u from School.  The paternal GM was in crt. everyday scrutinizing me to the CPS & Atty. Ad Litem.  I had no way of defending myself or knowing exactly what was going on in crt. I never got a voice in crt. until they took my grandkids from me, which the pat. GM said she was going to get the kids taken from me. She wanted revenge, was deceitful & jealous cause the girls formed a special bond with me. I  never once tried to come between them.  By then it was only a few more crt. hearings before the final hearing & I still was not heard.  Everyone kept telling me its o.k. I don't need an attorney. Now the kids are in VA. w/ their dads bro.  I have been lied to so much in front of the kids. CPS will not answer my calls. The pat GM call me bragging she was send girls earrings & necklace, but the uncle told me I could send them gifts from their great GM who he said reached out to them to communicate w/the kids.  This was in front of the kids on FB video chat. They were so excited.  then next day the aunt told me they were not to receive gifts from anyone.  They have changed the rules just like CPS many times.  I'm confused, so I know those little girls are too.  This is suppose to be in the best interest of the children?  I have to let a higher power take over or I will lose my self control.  Thank you everyone for your advice & for listening to my heart.  God Bless you all

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4 hours ago, SadAnnie said:

Thank you all for commenting on my situation & giving your honest opinion.  I've heard of a few people say they did have good experiences; this is great for them. There is the daughter of maternal GM side w/the paternal GM  if they get mad at the Mat. GM.  I had to stay home with the kids, take them & p/u from School.  The paternal GM was in crt. everyday scrutinizing me to the CPS & Atty. Ad Litem.  I had no way of defending myself or knowing exactly what was going on in crt. I never got a voice in crt. until they took my grandkids from me, which the pat. GM said she was going to get the kids taken from me. She wanted revenge, was deceitful & jealous cause the girls formed a special bond with me. I  never once tried to come between them.  By then it was only a few more crt. hearings before the final hearing & I still was not heard.  Everyone kept telling me its o.k. I don't need an attorney. Now the kids are in VA. w/ their dads bro.  I have been lied to so much in front of the kids. CPS will not answer my calls. The pat GM call me bragging she was send girls earrings & necklace, but the uncle told me I could send them gifts from their great GM who he said reached out to them to communicate w/the kids.  This was in front of the kids on FB video chat. They were so excited.  then next day the aunt told me they were not to receive gifts from anyone.  They have changed the rules just like CPS many times.  I'm confused, so I know those little girls are too.  This is suppose to be in the best interest of the children?  I have to let a higher power take over or I will lose my self control.  Thank you everyone for your advice & for listening to my heart.  God Bless you all

(((Hugs!)))

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My experience with DCC&P our version CPS in NJ has been dreadful. Well at least the office in my county, I have heard that things I have dealt with never happens in other counties.  Majority of the time and in situations they do what they want, they have bent the rules and circumvented policy to make their job easier. I have my two grandchildren, they have custody. When it is beneficial to them I'm grandmother but when it comes to decisions about my GK I'm just a foster/resource parent. They have never helped me get get services for my 5 yo grandson, when I would call and be in tears begging for help that I couldn't do this, their answer.."we can place the children!" I also know people that work there and was advised not to rock the boat to much because they will be vindictive and find a way to remove the children. I have had my GK for over 3 years now. 

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Donna, I'm sorry your experience with child services has been negative.  I am also sorry you have had to take over their care, but glad that you were there for them.

Welcome.

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When CPS was called where my GC were concerned I was pleasantly surprised. I had heard many horror stories about CPS and they also had been in the news here. However when CPS was involved with my grands they were professional. My son was assigned a case manager that did a great job helping him out. It seemed to take forever for them do get anything done but everything went ok. 

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5 hours ago, Donna55 said:

My experience with DCC&P our version CPS in NJ has been dreadful. Well at least the office in my county, I have heard that things I have dealt with never happens in other counties.  Majority of the time and in situations they do what they want, they have bent the rules and circumvented policy to make their job easier. I have my two grandchildren, they have custody. When it is beneficial to them I'm grandmother but when it comes to decisions about my GK I'm just a foster/resource parent. They have never helped me get get services for my 5 yo grandson, when I would call and be in tears begging for help that I couldn't do this, their answer.."we can place the children!" I also know people that work there and was advised not to rock the boat to much because they will be vindictive and find a way to remove the children. I have had my GK for over 3 years now. 

Bless you, Donna for being there for your GC (grandchildren) Like Sue, ! I'm sorry that your experience w/ DCP&P has been so negative. That's so unfair to both you and the kids!

Have you been able to get needed services for your little GS some other way? I hope so.

If not, the 3rd post in the Welcome thread in the Grandparents Caring for Grandkids forum may provide you w/ some helpful information *just click it on):

 

 

(((Hugs!)))

Edited by RoseRed135

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On 2/16/2017 at 11:37 PM, SadAnnie said:

Thank you all for commenting on my situation & giving your honest opinion.  I've heard of a few people say they did have good experiences; this is great for them. There is the daughter of maternal GM side w/the paternal GM  if they get mad at the Mat. GM.  I had to stay home with the kids, take them & p/u from School.  The paternal GM was in crt. everyday scrutinizing me to the CPS & Atty. Ad Litem.  I had no way of defending myself or knowing exactly what was going on in crt. I never got a voice in crt. until they took my grandkids from me, which the pat. GM said she was going to get the kids taken from me. She wanted revenge, was deceitful & jealous cause the girls formed a special bond with me. I  never once tried to come between them.  By then it was only a few more crt. hearings before the final hearing & I still was not heard Everyone kept telling me its o.k. I don't need an attorney. Now the kids are in VA. w/ their dads bro.  I have been lied to so much in front of the kids. CPS will not answer my calls. The pat GM call me bragging she was send girls earrings & necklace, but the uncle told me I could send them gifts from their great GM who he said reached out to them to communicate w/the kids.  This was in front of the kids on FB video chat. They were so excited.  then next day the aunt told me they were not to receive gifts from anyone.  They have changed the rules just like CPS many times.  I'm confused, so I know those little girls are too.  This is suppose to be in the best interest of the children?  I have to let a higher power take over or I will lose my self control.  Thank you everyone for your advice & for listening to my heart.  God Bless you all

I so feel for you, SadAnnie!

About the comments I bolded - I'm astounded and appalled that you didn't get a chance to speak in court/tell your side of the story. How can the court call it a "hearing" if both sides aren't given the chance to be heard?! I take it they didn't even ask you any questions in court at any time. Am I correct?

IDK who "everyone" was who told you there was no need for an attorney. Sounds like they were wrong. Often, I've noticed people give that advice b/c technically, a lawyer isn't required and, of course, can be expensive, etc. Such people are well-meaning, no doubt, but they don't always realize that if your adversary is aggressive, you (general) may very well need an attorney to fight back.

But that's neither here or there, of course, as it's in the past and your GC are now in VA. As I've said elsewhere, I'm glad they're w/ family (I realize there are some wonderful "professional" foster parents, but still...)

As for the "lies"  and rule changes - so sorry!  If it's any comfort at all, any changes may be due to the move - children's services in one state often have some different rules than in another state. IOWs, what appears to be "lying" may just be the result of a change of states/agencies w/ different rules/laws/etc.

Also, how disappointing & confusing to be told you could send gifts and then told you couldn't! And how unfortunate that the kids heard this, only to be disappointed, as well. I'm not sure if this is a matter of "changing the rules" or poor communication between the aunt and uncle. Hopefully, from now on, they will talk things over first before making any promises. In their defense, this situation is new for them, and they are bound to make a few mistakes, as hurtful as that may be... sigh... for you, the GGM, the kids, etc.

In another thread you told us the aunt was more of a stickler for the rules than the uncle. That could be part of the problem, too. She may have merely been following rules laid down by CPS, while he may think some the rules are "silly," "unnecessary" or "unfair," etc. What he might not realize - but perhaps the aunt does - is if they break CPS' rules, the kids could be taken away from them/uprooted again and placed w/ someone else, possibly even strangers. Would you or he want that? I don't think so. Again, iMO, the aunt and uncle need to get on the same page - and I'll add, be on the same page w/ CPS - before they tell anyone what they can and can't do.

I may be wrong about what has happened, of course - just feeling around for possibilities...

Anyhow, I hope the "no gifts" rule is just temporary, until they've had more chance to bond w/ each other and for the kids to get comfortable in their new home. And I hope the situation improves, overall, as time goes on. I'm glad your faith is helping to see you through. And I hope you keep reaching out to us, as well.

 

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Hello, I have a similar problem with my son's mother-in-law. She has convinced them that I am going to take their baby away from them. My granddaughter lives in SC with her parents. I would only get to see her a couple of times a year and when I did, my son and his wife would be invited, and therefore it would be a supervised visit by her parents. I am blocked on cell phone, facebook, and text messages. I am not even allowed any pictures. This is my first grandchild and I have looked forward to having grandchildren. She is 5 months old and I saw her once for 2 1/2 hours, by the time they visited 2 months later, I was no longer allowed to see her. My son and I were really close and this rips my heart out. The other GM was trying to collect information to get a restraining order against me. I don't know if I will get one or not. But the absolute vindictiveness of this woman is appalling. I don't understand why she feels the need to do this. She sent me pictures of her holding my GC and videos of her talking to my GC. It was an evil thing to do but I relish the little bit I can see of her. I don't know what to do.

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SoSad, I am sorry you find yourself in this predicament.  Is there nothing you can think of that could have planted a seed in the parents minds to even think that there might be an issue brewing?  The other GM was trying to collect information to get a restraining order against me.

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8 hours ago, SoSadItHurts said:

Hello, I have a similar problem with my son's mother-in-law. She has convinced them that I am going to take their baby away from them. My granddaughter lives in SC with her parents. I would only get to see her a couple of times a year and when I did, my son and his wife would be invited, and therefore it would be a supervised visit by her parents. I am blocked on cell phone, facebook, and text messages. I am not even allowed any pictures. This is my first grandchild and I have looked forward to having grandchildren. She is 5 months old and I saw her once for 2 1/2 hours, by the time they visited 2 months later, I was no longer allowed to see her. My son and I were really close and this rips my heart out. The other GM was trying to collect information to get a restraining order against me. I don't know if I will get one or not. But the absolute vindictiveness of this woman is appalling. I don't understand why she feels the need to do this. She sent me pictures of her holding my GC and videos of her talking to my GC. It was an evil thing to do but I relish the little bit I can see of her. I don't know what to do.

My heart breaks for you, SoSadHurt! What a painful experience! (((Hugs!)))

I'm a little confused as to where the baby lives though. Is she w/ DS (dear son) and DIL (daughter-in-law) or w/ the MGM (maternal grandmother)?

Also, it seems you have seen baby twice in the 5 months since she was born. Is that correct? Did anything happen on or after that 2nd visit that may have led to this trouble?

And, at the risk of asking too many questions (you don't have to answer all - or any - of them, of course), was the MGM trying to get a RO to keep you away from her? Or the baby? Or ??

Regardless, I know this situation is very hurtful, and I'm glad you reached out to us. Welcome!

Edited by RoseRed135

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The baby lives in SC with her parents. I saw her just once. When they came to MD, I wasn't allowed to see her. No, nothing happened in between the two visits. So, I'm at a total loss about what happened. I knew they were coming and told my son that I had presents for the baby and to fit me in their schedule. But I never got the chance.

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@SoSadItHurts - More (((hugs!)))

Let me see if I have this straight. You live at a distance from DS and family and have only seen your new GD once in 5 months. Ordinarily, I would say that's not unusual, given the distance. But, apparently, they visited your area and didn't take time to see you. That stinks! Is it possible they gave all their time on that trip to family members who had not yet seen baby? What reason did they give for not seeing you (if any)?... Just trying to help you figure this out...

I'm still not clear on the MGM's role/possible influence here either.

I would only get to see her a couple of times a year and when I did, my son and his wife would be invited, and therefore it would be a supervised visit by her parents.

Who told you this ^^^^ is how things would be? Could there have been a misunderstanding? Is it possible these were intended as "family visits" rather than "supervised" one?

I am not even allowed any pictures.

She sent me pictures of her holding my GC and videos of her talking to my GC. It was an evil thing to do but I relish the little bit I can see of her.

Ok, I'm confused. DS and DIL won't send you pix, but the MGM did. Is it possible she feels bad about what's happening and was trying to be helpful/reach out to you? I get that it hurts for you to see GC w/ her, but perhaps she didn't think of that. Or maybe she knew you would "relish the little bit" you can see of baby and thought she was doing a good thing?

The other GM was trying to collect information to get a restraining order against me.

Not sure how you know this ^^^^, but rest assured, as long as she doesn't have custody of your GC, she can't get an RO that keeps you away from anyone but herself (perhaps that would be just as well, seeing how you feel about her).

No, nothing happened in between the two visits.

But perhaps there was some arguing during their visit to MD about why they weren't coming to see you and get baby's gifts? Perhaps some hurtful things were said? Even if so, however, I don't see... sigh... how that could cause them to shut you out so completely, unless there has been an ongoing argument about visits... but even then... IDK... so very sorry about all this.

I don't know what to do.

I wish I could give you some surefire formula to make this all better. But, of course, I can't. All I think you can do now is wait, give DS and DIL some time to calm down about whatever has set them off and see if/when they reach out to you again. Till then, I hope you can fill your life w/ other interests, if you haven't already - hobbies, work, friends, volunteering, etc. And, of course, please keep talking w/ us... Peace...

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OK. I took a really long story and gave you the Reader's Digest version. Two years ago my son and his wife moved to SC with his wife's grandparents. SC is a twelve hour drive from me. I took this information badly. I knew they were going to move but I never imagined it would be so far away. Honestly, I had a terrible hissy fit. I don't know why because I knew he would go anyhow. Then he and I became estranged, him cutting me out of his life.

My daughter told me that my DIL was pregnant. I started sending gifts and I was very generous. So my son then got in touch with me because he was concerned that I was spending too much money. After that, he and I started talking. My DIL thought that I was trying to break them up when I found out they were moving. That thought never entered my mind. My DIL refused to reconcile with me.

I begged my son to let me go to SC when the baby was three weeks old. I wanted to see her and hold her while she was a newborn. He begged his wife and she finally agreed but I was not allowed to go to their house. They came to the hotel. My son was very happy for me to see the baby. My DIL barely said two words to me. That was in September.

My daughter got married in November. They came to the wedding. My son was made to follow me during the wedding while I was holding the baby. So I only held her for about ten minutes. Being mother of the bride, me hosting the wedding, left me little time to talk to them. When they were leaving, I met them outside. My son was pushing the stroller, I put my hand on the handle of the stroller to stop him so I could find out if they were coming over my house the next day. I had been inviting him and telling him I had more presents for the baby. My DIL came up from my son and took the stroller and ran off. I immediately let go. My son then told me they didn't have time to come over. The entire incedent lasted between 10 - 15 seconds.

Then my son went home and blocked me again. I had no idea what happened between September and November. After my daughter got back from the honeymoon, she talked to my son. He told her that my DIL mother said that I was preventing them from leaving. Her mother is a retired police officer. So she was making more out of the incedent than it was. Then I drew the conclusion that my DIL mother was influencing her to keep the baby away from them.

In January, her mother contacted me saying that she wanted to send me pictures and of course I said yes even though I was suspicious. She told me all kinds of things that I knew weren't true. Like:

my son wasn't working and she was supporting them.

they kept dropping the baby at the GGM and didn't want to be bothered with her.

they would lay the baby on the floor on a blanket and leave the room and allow their two pitbulls to be alone with her.

I knew there was no way that was true. Then she hit me with my DIL thinks I plan to take the baby away from her. That's when I blew my top off. I believe she had been filling my DIL head with a lot of stuff and that is why I couldn't see her the weekend of the wedding.

So that was when I got a couple of pictures but that didn't last long and I told her I would no longer talk to her. I didn't know that she couldn't get a restraining order but I believe she was trying to get me to say I wanted to take the baby away since they weren't taking care of her. And then she could be a witness to me saying I wanted to take her away.

I hope that clears it all up. If you have any ,ore questions, let me know.

Thank you!

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You need to have a meeting w/your son (and DIL - is she an only child? - if she would) and get this to the foreground.  His MIL knows the system and how to work it - and DIL likely has no idea that things may well have been worked around her w/o her knowledge w/the spin the MIL is putting on this....

If it continues, it might well blow up in MIL face - but it will be several years before this happens.....

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@SoSadItHurts - Thanks for filling us in so much further! Often that's how it goes on these boards - a member begins w/ an abridged version of the story and then fills in details as others ask questions. Perfectly ok.

There's a lot to take in here though. My first reactions are...

1. Apparently, you and DS have been estranged before, so this isn't something new. But he softened before and, hopefully, he will again.

2. The initial "hissy fit" was an unfortunate mistake (but you seem to know that). Not only b/c, as you say, DS would move, anyhow, but b/c it gave the wrong impression/made it look as if you were trying to interfere in his and DIL's decision (I know you were just disappointed and upset). And, of course, DIL seems to have read more into it... sigh... It's in the past, but, sadly, it got you off onto the wrong foot...sigh...

3. There seems to have been a lot of misunderstanding, as well, both on DIL's part and her mom's. I'm very sorry about that.

Or maybe "misunderstanding" isn't quite the right word. Unless there's something you're not telling us, MGM sounds a little unbalanced - or else extremely manipulative or both. She appears to be prone to telling each of you "stories" about the other - again, unless there are things you don't know or aren't saying - for whatever reasons she has.(perhaps to try to cause trouble?).  I'm very sorry about that, too.

4. Also, FWIW, I didn't say "she couldn't get a restraining order" - I said I don't see how she can get one that will keep you away from baby/to my knowledge, she can only get one that keeps you away from her (MGM). Or do DS, DIL and GD live w/ her? That might make a difference, IDK.  Your decision to no longer talk to this apparently odd woman was probably a wise one, as it seems you can't trust what her motives are.

After I reread this, I might have some more to say. IDK yet. I see Nana-mom has replied and surely, some others will, too. For now, I just hope that the estrangement eases in time - w/ DS, if not w/ DIL - and that you get to see and hold GD once again.

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I'm new and I have a long, horrifying story I will eventually tell. Reading this board has already been helpful. 

My first experiences with CPS were as an adoptive parent. My DD was born to drug-addicted parents (my ex-husband's brother) and after being taken by CPS at age 18 months, we got temporary custody and bent over backwards to accommodate visitation during the parents' reunification...but after 3 years the parents did not keep up with visits or classes, and my ex and I adopted her. (Right after my husband told me he was leaving me after 20 years of marriage for someone he met at work...but that's a whole different story.) On the foster/adoptive parent side, I had really good experiences with CPS.

I've also had dealings with CPS in reporting neglect and abuse as a mandated reporter, and when being interviewed by workers about some of my students. All positive experiences.

Two weeks ago, though, my son and his girlfriend (rightfully so) had their baby boy removed from their custody in the hospital after the baby and the mom tested positive for opiates. I'm NOT defending them whatsoever. The news of their addiction and subsequent pregnancy have been a NIGHTMARE and are inexcusable. But the CPS worker's attitude towards them, the medical staff, and myself in the delivery room was stone-cold and cruel. I had to fight to get the opportunity to hold my grandson after his birth - if I hadn't, NOBODY would be holding him. It was only for a short amount of time in the NICU, while the worker could supervise me. I  talked to a supervisor later and she allowed the parents to visit 30 minutes per day under my supervision. When the judge finally changed it to unlimited visitation in the hospital setting for the parents, that same original CPS worker called the hospital and gave them OPPOSITE information (that the parents' visitation was being taken away except for 2 hours per week.) My son had to take a court order into the hospital to refute the worker and be allowed to visit his son.

What gets me, was that the anger the worker had towards the parents for being addicted and pregnant, ended up with (in my opinion) her punishing the baby by refusing to allow any family to have visitation. We now also know the baby has a rare genetic disorder that usually results in death by 7 days old, and this disorder has nothing to do with their addiction (though of course the withdrawal symptoms did). So now, as a grandparent, I am trying to make sure my son and his girlfriend follow through on getting and staying clean, as well as grieving with them and helping them plan their baby's funeral, though we're not exactly sure when he will pass. And trying to stay current on my grandson's hospitalization and care...and raise my needy 14-year-old daughter who is angry at me for all the time this has taken away from her...and keeping current at my job. All of this in addition to the cold attitude of CPS has been awful. Today I ended up leaving work because I felt sick...but I have no fever, no other symptoms, and I'm wondering if I'm having some sort of physiological response to all of this stress.

Anyway...thanks for letting me vent!
 

 

 

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(((((hugs))))) because I simply do not know what to say.

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Wow....welcome....happy you've chosen to share here. But wow....I am so sorry for the impending loss of your new grandson. 

Is it possible to take a stress leave from your job to get some rest?

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I would love to take a leave of absence. I've seen a counselor who has already suggested it. Financially, it would just be hard. Since I'm a teacher I'm going to try to hold on until the end of the school year. Thank you for letting me share. I hope that someday I won't just be venting....I hope this will all be behind me, and give me some background to be able to help others too.

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