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NewMama

Taking a TO

27 posts in this topic

On 8/9/2017 at 8:46 AM, NewMama said:

DH and I had a rather big fight about MIL, the end result of which was I decided I needed a break from her. Since last fall DH had been seeing her on weekends I work, and I went several months without seeing her and it was a welcome relief. But I've now seen her a few times since spring, and I realized I'm just not able to be around her at the moment. DH pushing me to sweep everything under rug sent me over the edge. DH isn't thrilled I don't want to see his mom, but has agreed to go back to visiting with her on the weekends I work. He said he'll tell her to stop with the cards and random gifts, but I'm not convinced he will yet. I was clear I don't want to receive anything from her. Her sending me a birthday card started the fight. 

So, my questions for those of you who took a TO - did you decide on a length of time ahead of time? Wait and see? What did you tell your kids, if anything?

Having the reverse situation. I ended up taking a live in job to not interfere. As I could not get them to leave my house. I came home alternating weekends. Just to be with the GC and my teen DTR. Now years later it feels as if I have lost any connections with my DTR. There are several issues at play that make our situation extreme. But in the end I feel as if I lost on all levels.

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2 hours ago, Forthebabies said:

Having the reverse situation. I ended up taking a live in job to not interfere. As I could not get them to leave my house. I came home alternating weekends. Just to be with the GC and my teen DTR. Now years later it feels as if I have lost any connections with my DTR. There are several issues at play that make our situation extreme. But in the end I feel as if I lost on all levels.

My heart is aching for you!

Thanks for reminding us, though, that these kinds of situations can occur in both directions.

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