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SueSTx

Men who cat-call women

11 posts in this topic

I found an interesting article online:

PARIS (AFP) - 

A new law banning cat-calling and harassment of women on French streets will see men fined on the spot for lecherous and aggressive behaviour, France's women's minister said Monday.

Also, do a search on mothers confronting their sons cat-catting women.  I don't speack Spanish, but this is enlightening.

Or see Dads react to their daughters being cat-called.

 

Edited by SueSTx
Clarify title

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I live in the middle of no where, where everyone knows everybody and didn't realize that this goes on in the city so much?  Is it a normal everyday thing?  When I lived in the state Capital as a young lady, I was whistled at etc usually by construction workers and you just avoided walking in those areas... but this seems so forward.  Yet in a small rural community a grandfather called out his vehicle a derogative statement and when I turned around and he knew who I was, I got an apology.  And that was in the 70's.  What is going on?

One group of teen age boys said they were boys being boys and when asked how they would feel if someone treated their own mother or sister this way they said that would be creepy.  One older father even was all right as long as men were calling his daughter beautiful ect, but when they got more aggressive he said if he heard it, there would be a fist fight.

Why is this considered normal or OK by anyone?  I loved the mothers confronting their sons.

I taught my son that this action is creepy and unacceptable.  He is approaching his 40's now, and if I ever heard him do this, I think I might "box his ears".

Edited by SueSTx
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I remember DM telling me never to answer catcalls, etc., that even a negative mark might be seen as an "invitation." (Probably true, considering the mentality of some guys.) Then, when I was a freshman in college, I read an article in a magazine giving the same advice but, also suggesting that you (general women/girls) keep a little smile on your face as you walked on, so the men wouldn't "think you're a prude." 

I bought it totally back then. I even put it into practice once when I went into town alone and a male stranger not only made comments to me, but followed me for a couple of blocks, trying to get my attention. (I was on my way back to the campus, and he stopped as we got closer to it.)

Looking back, I can't believe that magazine's advice! And I can barely believe that I fell for it! A guy was harassing me - why would I worry about what he thought of me?

By the time I graduated college, "sexual harassment" had become an issue that people were talking about (obviously, not enough). But back when I was a freshman... well... that article I read was not atypical, as far as I recall. While lewd comments, etc., weren't exactly "acceptable," it seemed the owness was often put on women/girls to deal.

Edited by RoseRed135

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1 hour ago, SueSTx said:

  Yet in a small rural community a grandfather called out his vehicle a derogative statement and when I turned around and he knew who I was, I got an apology. 

But if he hadn't known you, do you think you would have gotten an apology? Does some of this have to do, people, w/ whether the man knows the woman or not?

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Why would any grandfather proposition any young 19 yr old whether he knew her or not?

An older man remarked that he was a 'Merican as such he had the right to call out anything he wanted to anyone he saw...how crude is that?

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I think misogyny not only blends into the human condition of striving "to get" at the expense of others but also masculinity unnecessarily- As a result, a big chunk of the problem I think stems from the fact that "a man" may not consider himself much of a man if he doesn't retain some sense of misogyny- Note the older mans tone in Sue's post- He's not defending free speech, he's defending his flawed sense of masculinity -- I think ..

Domination, supremacy and control have served a purpose for the greater good -- sometimes .. but I can't claim to know where in human history women truly posed a threat to the opposite sex as a whole .. but I can understand how men came to think that women are inferior- But a threat? No-

 

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I remember being 15, out with friends on a day trip to *big city* (We were all suburb kids). A car full of guys yelling, wagging their tongues, honking...

Seems to me that there's no other reason THAN to harass someone to behave like that. Does waggling a tongue at a woman EVER end up with her running over to you? I suppose if it's her *job*...

Basically, it seems to me that men aren't doing it to actually get a positive reaction. They're doing it to embarrass and upset the women. Which makes them bullies and jerks.

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1 hour ago, SueSTx said:

Why would any grandfather proposition any young 19 yr old whether he knew her or not?

An older man remarked that he was a 'Merican as such he had the right to call out anything he wanted to anyone he saw...how crude is that?

Sexism and some kind of weird, twisted racism rolled into one!

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Puerto Rico trumped NYC for cat-calls back in the 70's-

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13 minutes ago, Komorebi said:

Puerto Rico trumped NYC for cat-calls back in the 70's-

Not sure what this means...?

I  do know I've heard that such behavior is considered "more acceptable" in some countries/regions than others.

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14 minutes ago, RoseRed135 said:

Not sure what this means...?

I  do know I've heard that such behavior is considered "more acceptable" in some countries/regions than others.

Absolutely, every culture is different and experiences shifts- I've not returned to Puerto Rico since the 70's, so I have no idea if it's the same -- or not- I'm simply sharing that while there, back then, walking down the street especially in the evening, it happened somewhere between frequent and constant- :)

Puerto Rico used to have balmy/sultry evenings, a huge population of coqui calling for mates, which kind of sounded like symphony- So I can understand the cat-calling practice, there ..

But I was reading that the coqui have migrated inland for whatever reason, and have slowly been doing so for some time now- Could be deforestation, could be weather related- Everything is changing, everywhere .. environmentally .. and it impacts people, too- So, maybe cat-calling is less there now than it used to be ..

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