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      Tell us about your experience with signing up for Medicare   01/23/18

      We want to know what the process was like for you, any difficulties you experienced, the length of your process, etc. This is strictly research and any information you share with us will not be shared elsewhere. Please email jack@grandparents.com with the subject line: Medicare Process and we'll be in touch with specific questions.
    • LaToyaADMIN

      PLEASE READ: We are moving the community   02/15/18

      Dear Community friends and family,   After great consideration, we are moving the Grandparents.com community to Facebook Groups effective March 15, 2018.   This wasn’t an easy decision, but we want to bring our communities together and believe the best place to do so is through Facebook’s groups feature. We’re so appreciative of you and the diverse conversations and opinions you have provided over the past 9 years. Your stories and amazing advice have helped so many readers, and have reached thousands of GP.com users. We encourage you to retrieve any information you want to retain as the forum will only be accessible by the admin after March 15, 2018. We’ve created a closed Facebook group called Mothers-in-Law Unplugged where we welcome you to continue the conversations around grandparenting, family, and in-law relationships, and any general topics we discuss here. As the group is closed and each user must be approved, your friends and family on Facebook won’t see any of your activity. Request to join the group here: http://bit.ly/milunplugged Thank you to all of our past and current users. You helped build our community, and we look forward to continuing to interact with you in the Facebook groups. If you have any questions about the groups and privacy, let’s chat about here:   Sincerely,   The Grandparents.com Team
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tedybearnana

Hello JRD - glad to have you!

3 posts in this topic

I'm so glad you joined - we are small, but mighty - and it isn't good to have no where to go when you need to talk. Hope you'll post and let me know what's going on with you. I know you tried hard to get one going. People just aren't coming to gp.c as much any more. MilAnon is the big draw in gp.c - and they can really be a tough group to be a member of - i tried, thinking it was a good place to go if i had a dil question! WHOO! they chewed me up and spit me out the first post i made! that's why they are popular - they are explosive and entertaining unless you're the 'goat', lol. i, myself, have a 43 year old son trying to get back on his feet (in this economy) after spending a year in prison on a dui charge. it just isn't easy with a felony record these days. not only, that, he has always had problems from youngest childhood and needs help. he has no other place to live and not enough money coming in to get a place. he is working temp - but hasn't gotten hired in yet. we often have to help him financially - and he's quite difficult to live with as he is as 'oppositional' as he was when he was 13. while trying to help him, we also try not to 'enable' too much. i have many years in AlAnon and started and ran a ToughLove group for several years when he was a teen. (so, i have some experience in a variety of areas, including depression, which i've dealt with since childhood. Anyway - I'm so glad you're here. I hope you'll tell a little about yourself and share what's going on so we know what's going on, too. thanks - tedy

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My daughter and son in law and 2 childsons, 18 mos and 6 years, moved into my home as we all agreed it was a better financial move for us all. Keeping the 6 year old in Christian Private school a priority for us all and it was financially a problem. I am now single and am taking care of the boys several evenings a week, parents both work nights, and my kids pay me as they would a baby sitter. I work full time for a missions agency during the day. I established a two bedroom apartment in my home a few years ago so it is really a good set up. As with every living situation we are just trying to navigate the pros and cons and I am trying not having unrealistic expectations. Transistion is messy but no mes sno progress. I am just very busy with everything and every one else and feel like I am getting lost in it all. Thank you for being so vulnerable and reaching out and sharing your story. Figurng out how to help your adult children with out parenting is challanging I know. I will be praying for your son to find the kind of job he will love and thrive at. Just having a job is not good enough you have to feel good about what you are doing and really do what your good at Or you get bored and medicate with something. What happened to your son at an early age to make him so angry? That is the key! I am not prying so no need to expound. I was just making an observation that I have found from years of pursuing inner healing. Thanks again. I don;t get on here often as you have noticed but will try to catch you later.

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Hi JRD - i'm SO sorry to have missed your post until now. i don't know how it happened as i'm in the room at least twice a day. the apartment within your home sounds like a very helpful solution to some of the typical problems our families who's children return home (including mine). it is all a big adjustment for everyone, altho the apt will help. i have found that sitting down together and setting up a list of 'rules' that everyone agrees they can live with (or you insist is a MUST)is very helpful. you babysit and are paid. that's good. did you say (or not?)whether they pay any rent for the apartment? that would certainly be appropriate. i don't know what they do for a living, but they are getting a good deal on this and should be able to pay something toward rent, utilities, etc. believe me - those add up (especially if you are feeding them many of their meals. your grocery bill will go up, too. all of this is very practical and will keep YOU from eventually 'put upon', which is one of the biggest complaints i hear about (except for how to deal with children). that's a biggie, but if you are babysitting and they are happy with that, then i suppose you have worked out a system that you both agree with. it sounds to me as if you are one of the ones who will very possibly make this work without it causing you to need to join my other room -Shades of Blue - that deals with the blahs, blues and depression and includes the families of depressed people who need to sound off and get ideas and hugs for their efforts. it's a lot of work assisting a depressed person. re my son. he was born ADHD and eventually ODD (oppositional defiant disorder). he was extremely hyper and i couldn't turn my back for a second. at 2 i pulled him off the top of the fridge. at 3 he kicked out his window screen shortly after his birthday and a neighbor came over at about 8 a.m. to tell me she thought my little boy was over across the street, behind her house playing on the railroad track that was an active track. it was one thing after another and, partly due to my depression problems, partly because his dad worked 2 jobs so i could stay home with the kids and i was over-whelmed with 2 babies in 18 mo's, basically raising them alone. he heard lots of 'no's, don'ts, stops, quits' - negativity that came along with his behavior. it's a long, sad story, but that's pretty much where it all began. i felt quite guilty that i might have given it to him, etc - my mom was quite hyper - and it may have happened or that it might have been my imagination or i caused it somehow. he assured me that he could walk through a newborn nursery and tell which ones were hyperactive and which weren't, just by the way they slept. it's been quite hard. i love him very dearly as he has many really great personality traits, as well as his oppositionalism that just never went away. still, we butt heads a lot to this day, and it is very old. bottom line with your kids - get everything you can imagine (think ahead of time and write down your thoughts and points to talk about). i hope for the best for you. if things come up, let me know. either i've been through it myself or i have a friend who has. hugs -and keep me posted!

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